This picture is so sweet that I had to share it with you. This is Jordyn and her daddy, Darren. Darren is this very tall man who has the most tender heart towards his precious wife, Brittnee and their daughter, Jordyn. Brittnee was my client when Jordyn was born. She is pregnant again, and I am so sad that they have moved. They now live in North Dakota, so I can’t be their doula. Such a sweet family!!
If You Give a Mom a Muffin
By Beth Brubaker
If you give a mom a muffin,
she’ll want a cup of coffee to go with it.
She’ll pour herself some.
Her three year-old will come and spill the coffee.
Mom will wipe it up.
Wiping the floor, she will find dirty socks.
She’ll remember she has to do laundry.
When she puts the laundry into the washer,
she’ll trip over shoes and bump into the freezer.
Bumping into the freezer will remind her she has to plan supper.
She will get out a pound of hamburger.
She’ll look for her cookbook
(How to Make 101 Things With a Pound of Hamburger.)
The cookbook is sitting under a pile of mail.
She will see the phone bill, which is due tomorrow.
She will look for her checkbook.
The checkbook is in her purse,
which is being dumped out by her two year-old.
Then she’ll smell something funny.
She’ll change the two year-old.
While she is changing the two year-old, the phone will ring.
Her five year-old will answer and hang up.
She’ll remember she was supposed to phone a friend
to come over for coffee.
Thinking of coffee will remind her that she was going to have a cup.
She will pour herself some more.
And chances are,
if she has a cup a coffee,
her kids will have eaten the muffin that went with it.
Please share this with others. I a lot of crotch danglers and it makes me crazy. Think of how these little ones feel when they are being carried wrong.
By Margarita Tartakovsky, M.S.
Associate Editor
Moms aren’t the only ones who struggle with postpartum depression. Dads struggle, too.
In this 2010 meta-analysis published in The Journal of the American Medical Association, researchers reviewed 43 studies with over 28,000 participants and found that 10 percent of men had prenatal or postpartum depression. That’s more than double the rate of men who suffer from depression in the general population — 4.8 percent.
In their book The Pregnancy & Postpartum Anxiety Workbook: Practical Skills to Help You Overcome Anxiety, Worry, Panic Attacks, Obsessions and Compulsions, authors Pamela S. Wiegartz, Ph.D, and Kevin L. Gyoerkoe, PsyD, note that depression can strike dads at any time, from their wife’s pregnancy to months after their child’s birth.
Symptoms of depression can include depressed mood; loss of interest in activities; fatigue; changes in sleep; changes in appetite or weight; difficulty concentrating or making decisions; feelings of guilt or worthlessness; and thoughts of death or suicide.
Men, however, may struggle with different symptoms. The lead author of the above meta-analysis, James Paulson, told Scientific American (in this piece by Katherine Harmon) that some researchers have called for a change in the diagnostic criteria because men tend to struggle with irritability, detachment and emotional withdrawal.
To read the rest of the article go here:
Recently a friend of mine, shared the idea of having your child paint a wooden Easter egg every year. I thought it would be great fun to try it with my grandson, Lincoln. First, I painted the wooden eggs with a yellow base coat. Then we stripped him down to just a diaper, and put 3 colors of acrylic paint in a pan. Then we painted his hands and let him play with the eggs. When he was done (or rather we were done), we quickly got him straight into the bathtub. After the paint dried, I put his name on the bottom of the eggs and put a clear coat of sealer on them. I plan to do this every year with him!
Wanting to pass on another great article mamas to read. I hear so many moms saying that they jumped right back into their everyday activities, while others struggle to get out of bed. This article makes sense to me, and I hope that it will to you too!
Women need a whole year to recover from childbirth despite the ‘fantasy’ image of celebrity mothers, study claims
Last updated at 4:59 PM on 17th February 2012
New mothers may be told that they will be back to ‘normal’ within six weeks of giving birth, but a new study has found that most women take much longer to recover.
Dr Julie Wray, of Salford University, interviewed women two to three weeks, three months and six to seven months after they had given birth to gain a unique insight into postnatal recovery.
She concluded that it takes a year to recover from childbirth. Her study also revealed significant dissatisfaction amongst new mothers with postnatal services
The new mothers Dr Wray spoke to said that the six week recovery time was a ‘fantasy’.
Many were disappointed by the six week check, which all mothers receive from either their midwife or their GP. Some did not receive a physical examination, and others were not told whether or not their bodies had recovered yet.
The psychological effects can also take much longer to recover from.
Dr Wray’s study found that hospital wards can have a negative impact on women’s ability to recoup and celebrate the birth of their child because of the constant stream of visitors and the unfamiliar rules and regulations.
Helping new mothers adapt to having a baby in the home has also changed a lot over the years.
In the past women were shown how to perform tasks such as baby bathing and were only discharged from hospital when they were ready.
Now women can go home as soon as six hours after childbirth and many feel they are just ‘left to get on with it’.
Dr Wray said: ‘The research shows that more realistic and woman-friendly postnatal services are needed.
‘Women feel that it takes much longer than six weeks to recover and they should be supported beyond the current six to eight weeks after birth.
‘However, government funding cuts and a national shortage of midwives means that postnatal services will only face further challenges. The midwifery profession must raise the status of postnatal care as any further erosion can only be bad for women and their children.’
The Royal College of Midwives welcomed the research.
Sue MacDonald, Head of Education and Research at the RCM told MailOnline: ‘We are very aware that the postnatal period has always been a bit of a fairy tale.
‘We are often not able to see women as much as we would like to. Community midwives may be able to help at home but not always, and mothers do not stay in hospital for very long after childbirth any more.
‘Women do suffer ill-health, which involves back ache and feeling tired. They could be seen as minor problems, but they are not minor for new mums.’
The physical recovery is, of course, just one side of the story. Women also need to make the psychological transition to being a mother – which is even tougher for those who were working before giving birth.
Many feel the pressure to get back on their feet soon after childbirth. And seeing celebrities like Amanda Holden looking fantastic just weeks after almost dying during childbirth must be ‘very, very frustrating’, MacDonald said.
She added that recent studies have shown that women will put up with a lot of discomfort after childbirth because they think that it is normal. The Royal College of Widwives is conducting its own studies to see how they can make sure that discomfort is not the norm.
We will find a book or article on almost any subject anywhere that we look. We will find parents and well meaning adults who think they have the answers for how you child should be developing. This can be challenging determining what is right for your child. When I read this from Rebecca Thompson, I knew that I needed to pass it on to you
Optimal development is about allowing the unfolding of the child. It isn’t on your time table or an author’s time table in a book you’ve just read, but rather it is about allowing your child to develop at the rate that is right for her. You may find this challenging, because many children do not follow the charts indicated in parenting books. Let go of the numbers in books and focus on the child you have right in front of you. For example, most babies are not sleeping through the night at 3 months, like many parenting books suggest, but much closer to 2 or 3 years when the part of their brain responsible for regulation of sleep has developed. Follow your child and let go of your own interpretation of what normal is.
©Rebecca Thompson, 2008
The Consciously Parenting Project
http://www.consciouslyparenting.com
The Consciously Parenting Project
Lactation Cookie Recipe
(Ingredients in the order in which they should be mixed)
1 cup butter
1 cup white sugar
1 cup packed brown sugar
2 tbsp flax seed (mixed with 4 tbsp water to soften)
2 eggs
1 tsp vanilla
1 tsp baking soda
2 cups flour
1 tsp salt
3 cups oats
1 cup chocolate chips (or raisins/nuts/etc)
4 tbsp brewers yeast
Fenugreek powder from capsules (I usually add the powder from 20 capsules, it’s up to you)
Bake at 350 degrees for 12 minutes or until edges turn brown.
They are more moist in the form of brownies but either way works fine.
Kathryn DiPalma
(559) 287-3231
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